Month: July 2013

To be rude or not to be rude?


Over the past week or so I’ve only done any writing on one day. I know it’s not very much but I found myself either busy, hung-over or doing chores. I probably could’ve done more writing in-between but I’ll make up for it over the next week. Don’t you worry.

Within the writing I actually managed to do, I found myself with the task of writing an ‘after sex’ scene. I had contemplated writing an actual sex scene but I prefer to let the reader imagine what went on between the sheets. Although on second thought I’m not so sure.

This scene was from my vampire myth story and concerned the main female character and one of the chief male support characters. Amanda and Peter are having an affair behind their friend Marks, and other chief male support character, back. They all work at the same Admin Company and were all friends with the lead male character of the story, Bruce. Bruce knew about the affair but kept it a secret as he was close with Amanda. Now that he has become the End Solution and the United Kingdom’s only recognised vampire (of sorts), Amanda has chosen to try and find him to make sure he is ok. Mark is willing to help her But Peter is not. Even with all this Amanda continues to see Peter. I think you know enough now.

It starts inside a room of the hotel they usually use. Both are discussing Bruce and their particular views on the subject. This is mostly to enhance Amanda’s need to find him and to show that Peter is against it. It’s all about character building people! Anyway, throughout the scene they are naked as I don’t think two people, who only really have sex and barely don’t do anything together when Mark isn’t there, would be too bothered about walking around in such a way.

Now I’m getting to the title of this here post and the end of it.

I was considering re-writing the scene with a bit more happening as they are naked. But I don’t think this is in keeping with the tone of the whole story so far. However, it could act as I a bit of a twist in the tone that could set up the same kind of twist in tone sporadically throughout the book for impact. So, my question is this…

Do you think it’s a good idea to be explicit, shocking, drastic et al in stories just for effect or should it always be in line with the tone of the story?

Your feedback would be awesome.




A fistful of grammar.


So, I’ve continued to brush up on my grammar skills and as it turns out, I know more than I thought I did. Maybe in my haste to get my stories written I’ve chosen to forget certain aspects of the wonderful, if not very frustrating, world of grammar.

As I’ve been reading through the exceptional book, ‘Improve your grammar; Learn the skills, master the language.’ By Collins. ( or I keep remembering things that I’ve somehow forgotten or easily working out what I should be doing. I’m currently on the section dedicated to commas and all their forms. And if I’ve missed any commas so far or hereafter, I’m sorry.

This has also helped me with my editing and writing over the past week. I’ve continued with my take on the vampire myth and editing one of my older stories. The writing is coming along nicely, although as it’s going along I’m realising that I’m going to need to create a lot more for the world this story takes place in.

It’s a world in which the Prime Minister rules the country like a dictator. He has put in place huge, gothic, dark buildings in each of the main towns and cities across the country. These help him to keep a watch over a majority of it. He uses special employees or ‘Operatives’ to keep an eye on the small villages and day to day life that he can’t control himself. This, as you might imagine, creates a whole host of questions and a whole host of answers to accompany them. I’ll let you know how I get on.

On the other hand, the editing process has been more fruitful than I’d previously anticipated. I’ve always liked editing but after almost two years away from the story I’m casting my eye on, I’m chopping and changing stuff and really starting to be critical of myself. I know I’ll have to go back over it again and again (location, character, descriptions and so on) but if it’s possible I’m looking forward to it more than I ever have.

Well, that’s me for now. I’m going to get back to it. Hmm…How do I end this post…why not with a question?

If you could change one thing about the world today, what would it be? And don’t feel like you have to choose a nice, save the world, type of option. Just go nuts if you like.





Hello feedback my old friend. How I cherish thee.


After posting a short story I’ve been working on for a bit in my last post I received plenty of feedback. This was all quite helpful and very much needed. After going back over the story with the feedback in mind I could see where the story needed to be improved. Thank you to all those who commented on it. I’ll be reviewing and editing said story soon and I’ll probably post it back up for more comments.

I haven’t had any of my stories critiqued in a while so this was all very refreshing. I received some good comments about the story as a whole. Lori Fetters Lopez gave some very valued feedback indeed. Thank you Lori. I also received some good, honest and straight to the point comments about my grammar and use of commas from a few editors that frequent the Facebook writing groups I’m part of. David Neely, Sean Cleary and Roy C. Booth thank you for time and words.

If I could give any advice about being a writer it would be to embrace all kinds of feedback and take all the good parts from it. If you find yourself on the receiving end of someone’s rant about your story just so they can use a whole host of long and not needed words then just laugh at it and pick out the bits you can actually use.

Right, I’m going to get back to it. And if there are any grammatical errors in this post, either let me know or leave me to find them later.


A new short story of mine.


This is a short story I finished a few months ago. I’ve been over it many times but would like a fresh view and feedback if possible.

It’s about a man who has lived all his life with a high pain thresh hold. This means he doesn’t feel the cold or the heat in the same way that everyone else does. He can feel these things but only at the last minute. He has felt trapped and lonely for most of his life so far. Until he decides to go for a run one Saturday morning…

The doctors have never been able to fully diagnose his condition. They settled on an extremely high pain thresh hold but it did not explain why he could not completely feel hot or cold temperatures. He is twenty nine years old, six foot tall, has short blonde hair and a nice looking face. His name is Oliver. There is no known cure for him.

“They won’t treat you differently.” his pixie like mother said one Friday morning in the kitchen.

“How do you know?” He replied. She looked around nervously and then back into his eyes. He gave her a kiss on the cheek but before he could leave she gave him a warm hug.

Oliver’s job was to distribute work to the employees of a small administration company. None of them knew about his condition. He and reluctantly his parents decided that only they would know. Oliver consequently only let a few people into his life at any given time through fear of being looked at or treated differently. He thought some people might find it cool but he didn’t want to take that chance.

“I can’t come out after work mate; I’m cooking dinner for my Mrs” His Italian looking friend Peter said. Oliver nodded and said they’d do it another time. He always felt lonely when Peter did anything with his other half. He felt the same way whenever he saw a couple holding hands. He quietly made his way home.

“Oliver!” his dad said from the bottom of the stairs. He had fallen asleep in the bath again which to him felt like he was wrapped in a slimy blob from the neck down. He only got out and got dressed after seeing how shrivelled up his body had become. “What’s that on your hand, son?” his dad said as he got to the bottom of the stairs. His dad was a short, portly, overly concerned man who fussed over him a lot. Oliver knew he was just trying to be his friend so he didn’t object.

“Oh, I burned myself the other day. It’s alright now though.” He said looking at the red mark on the outside of his right little finger. He burnt it whilst frying some bacon and as always only moved his hand when it was too late. He’d felt the pain but only at the last possibly second. He did like being able to withstand high amounts of pain but what he really wanted was to be mindful of going near a fire or being out in the cold for too long.

The following morning he decided to go for a run. As he was running on a clear Saturday morning he spotted a fire engine up the street. Getting closer he saw the wild flames climbing up the house next to it and remembered to stay back because of the heat. He looked up and saw a room and heard the cries of a baby inside.

Oliver knew he had a good chance of saving the baby. He quickly ran into the house and climbed the now almost completely fire ridden stairs. He knocked the door down and grabbed the baby as the smoke began to build. It made him cough ferociously as the stairs collapsed with an almighty bang. He went back into the baby’s room and shouted down to the firemen. They quickly sent up a ladder and brought them to safety.

“Can’t you feel that?” the mother said after taking the baby and hugging the life out of him. A news reporter and camera had appeared just behind her. Oliver looked down and saw numerous red marks on his legs and arms. He had briefly forgotten he was wearing shorts and t-shirt.

“Not completely. I can’t feel hot or cold.” He said without thinking. He’d never felt happier than after saying those six little words. It was as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
In the following weeks he became a local celebrity. He received an invitation to attend a nerve damage conference and accepted it for his mother’s sake. Peter insisted he go along with him. They sat down and waited for it to start.

“Hello, I’m Michelle.” A cute brunette girl with a flower in her hair said as she sat down next to him. She put out her hand and he was reluctant to shake it. “It’s ok. I can’t feel hot or cold either.”

One finishes and another begins.


After my lovely trip to Krakow and a few days more off work, which included a daft amount of drinks followed by a revolting hangover, I knew I had to get back into the swing of things.

Before going on holiday I was drawing ever closer to the end of the story I started whilst taking part in NaNoWriMo. I realised as I started to write again that the story was even closer than I thought to being finished. And then, as if by magic, it had finished. I suddenly realised that I was at the end of my story. It’s like it crept up on me whilst I was writing.

I had many ideas about how to end the story but all of them didn’t seem to work as I got to the last few lines of the book. I considered having it carry on after the hero’s had won the day but I ended up just finishing it with one line. After weeks of wondering how I was going to actually end my story, I settled on just one line of dialogue. If I can give out any advice about writing, and if anyone would listen, it would be this.

Trust your instincts.

After doing so and finishing my third full story since I started to write any kind of stories, I decided to edit one of the others I completed. It was a story about a small, self-sufficient town that lived in the shadow of a dense and dark forest. This forest was populated by monstrous bugbears that could attack them at any time. To stop this from happening, five hunters have been given the task to hunt and protect to town. It was a story born out of frustration as another story I had intended to be small had grown and needed more work. I just wanted to finish a story so I could go back to it and edit the thing later and iron out the creases. My very first blog post has as its subject this very story entitled ‘The Town of the Mountain.’

Anyway, the first draft has been done and I’ve started to edit it. Its looks like it will take a long time as after only the first chapter I’ve removed one big paragraph and trimmed down a lot of the others. Though I have to say I do enjoy it.

This leads me onto my question for this post….

How do you go about the editing process for any of your stories?