Author: johnrsermon

I’m a writer from Stockport, Manchester, England, who mainly enjoys writing short stories in the soft sci-fi genre. I do like writing in other genres, fantasy in particular, but I’ve settled on soft sci-fi because I enjoy adding fantastic things that could exist right now or in the near future. I’ve been writing in my spare time since around 2001 with varying degrees of discipline. I’m always looking for ways to improve myself and my writing, and I use my blog to showcase my writing and discuss things on my mind. Every so often I’ll talk about other things in my personal life (Football – I support Manchester United, Holidays, Food, amongst others). I enjoy writing short stories, but I have also finished a few novels and completed NaNoWriMo a couple of times. Writing makes me happy, and thankfully, I can’t see that changing any time soon. My interest in writing began when I took a Film Studies Course at College in 2001. One of the assignments was to create a character and give him or her a back story. I did this and got some good feedback from my tutor, and I loved the feeling of creating a character from scratch. My other interests include running and listening to rock and metal music whenever I’m running. I enjoy watching a wide range of films and TV to relax. The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly is my favourite film, and Arcane is my favourite TV show. My favourite authors are Giles Kristian, J.R.R Tolkien, JK Rowling, Bret Easton Ellis, Gareth L Powell, and Robert Lewis Stevenson. Thanks for reading. If you like the sound of the above, I’d be more than happy to discuss all manner of writing-related stuff. See my contact page for details.

And as I try to edit…stuff gets in the way and that.

Hello

 

I started, and finished, editing the fifth chapter of my tale regarding searchers (hunters) and the demons they take down in order to keep the world a safer place. I didn’t intend to finish the whole of the fifth chapter but as I was editing I just wanted to keep going. I finished the first three pages on Thursday night and then the last three on Sunday morning. I thought I’d only finish a few pages this week. The chapter concerned a visit from the hero’s estranged sister.

Now, so far Aaron (our hero)’s sister is going to be used as the device that turned Aaron towards a life fighting crime. First, with the police and then as a searcher. I’m thinking that I’ll keep this in as she also helps to link nicely with Aaron’s back story and how his upbringing was. At the end of chapter four I flashed back to when he was eleven and what caused the happiest memory he has from his childhood. After this, at the beginning of chapter five, I had Aaron mention how much of a waste of time it was whenever she came to visit. This will hopefully build to the exact reason why they are estranged and what ultimately what helps to drive him to do what he does. I seem to recall a few chapters down the line that I do come to this point so I’ll make another mental note to examine this story line in more detail. I’ll have to write the whole story separately so I can slot the important parts in to the main story. And that story will have to be edited. Wonderful. The job just keeps on getting bigger.

As to the stuff and that getting in the way, me and my girlfriend have found a house to rent after months of searching and trying to find someone to rent her flat beforehand. This has meant that a lot of packing and planning has to be done, which has gotten in the way of my editing. I’m not that fussed though. I’m looking forward to moving into to the new place. It’s just, packing is hard!

Anyway, I’ve got something else I need to pack. As always I hope you have a good week.

Bye!

I was editing and then…I got infected.

Hello

 

So, the edit has moved onto the Fifth chapter. Well, I’ve just finished the forth one last night. It’s moving along pretty well but I think I might have to go back and re write some of the descriptions for the women. I’ve actually just re wrote some of them right now. Thankfully, I didn’t have to change too much and (I think) I have the descriptions right. I’ll check them again when I do another edit just for descriptions. Whenever that will be. I’m considering changing my NaNoWriMo this year to editing 50,000 words. It would mean I finish my first edit by the end of November. Hmm…(strokes beard deep in thought)

In between my editing exploits I took a trip to Sheffield with a few mates. It started off well. A beer in the train station beforehand. A beer when we arrived. Some food after checking in at our various hotels (7 of us in total over 3 different hotels) then got in a taxi. Where was this taxi taking me? Who knows? Hang on…Asylum? What is this place? Has Sheffield been infected by a virus? What is that moving in darkness?…ARGH!!!!!

Ok. Alright. I’ll explain. My mate Paul had taken part in two previous events like this called 2.8 hours later. It’s a zombie survival game whereby you are tasked with getting uninfected water out of the ‘infected’ city of Sheffield back to the last base for surviving humans, Asylum. Well, parts of Sheffield anyway. All 7 of us, along with loads of other teams like ours all starting at different times, had to negotiate our way through streets full of zombies, accessing laptops at different locations to tell us where to go next. If you let yourself get immersed in it, as I did, it was well good/scary. I found myself sprinting as fast as I could as the ‘zombies’, played very well by those who volunteered to do so, slowly picked up speed and screamed at us. I only got caught because I forgot about a zombie that I thought was taken care of. Never mind. It was an awesome experience but not sure I’ll do it again. I’d have to train for it if I did. For more information if you’re interested, see www.2.8hourslater.co.uk.

So, I’ll leave you by saying that my edit goes on and here’s how I looked after getting infected. I got better…

IMG-20140914-WA0000

And it keeps on going. #amediting

Hello

 

And the edit goes on. I’ve managed to do three chapters and a bit so far. The story is in its introduction faze as in introducing people and building the picture. This will lead to research, which leads to a big re write in the back ground before rewriting the actual thing. I know this because…

I edited the first page of the forth chapter by mistake. I must’ve just printed off an extra page or something. That page reminded me of the first big back story I have to re-write for this story. The hero of the piece has a miscreant sister that inadvertently paved the way for him becoming a searcher. I have it in my mind’s eye and all that for her to come good in some way. But now I think about it, maybe she won’t. I don’t know at this point, but a vehicle was needed for my hero to travel in towards greatness so she’ll feature in some way.  I think I’ve got enough villains but they’re all demons. Should all my villains be non-humans? Who knows? I’ll probably decide whilst I’m in work and then struggle to find a pen to write it down. Fingers crossed I remember it when I’m already on Evernote.

I’ve found that I can edit a few pages in a sitting and not feel like I’m rushing. When I realised this I naturally assumed I could get the edit done slightly quicker than I thought. No dice sunshine said the universe. What with life having me doing loads of stuff, chief among these seeing my sister, brother in law and little nephew over the weekend, means that the edit will stay on the track it was on when I started. Whatever that was. As soon as I think I’m getting ahead, I find I’ve said to myself, just one more game of Pro Evo Soccer, too many times and the evening has got away from me. Here’s hoping I can get some discipline when it comes to that game.

Ok. I can’t think of anything to write so…have a good week doing whatever you do.

Good bye.

I think I’m getting the hang of this…Maybe.

Well, this editing thing is a coming along nicely. I’ve gone from editing a page a day to two or three and I’ve already come across a few things that I need to change.

Firstly, the location of my hero’s headquarters might have to change. Thankfully, all the descriptions of the inside and all the events, of which there are a considerable amount, can stay the same. The Rochdale canal runs underneath Deansgate Locks, which is where my hero’s headquarters are. I have already, whilst I’m writing, thought of a way around this so it should be ok. Although, I bet in an edit further down the line I’ll probably move it to somewhere completely different. I’ll have plenty of opportunity to think this over as the tram I get to and from work goes past the headquarters. I can look at it and make mental notes twice a day, five days a week. A complete solution will be found my friends. Or not. Who knows?

Secondly, the boss of all my searcher’s, the searcher general, did have a kind of Technicolor killing coat. I only realised when I started the edit that I had the general wearing a coat that changed colour according to the situation. A different colour for a hunt, a different colour for his own anger, a different colour for the times in-between, and so on. Now, the world in which my story transpires does have demons in it and searcher/hunters with (fully explained) super strength, agility, speed, etc. but I haven’t included any magic. Just because I didn’t want to so randomly having one character with a magic trench coat doesn’t work. I got round this by having the general, who’s been around for a very long time, having a collection of different coats for his moods and the situation. It does fit in with his character so I’ve solved that one. For now.

I have to say I’m enjoying the edit so far. I’m looking forward to sculpting my story as I go along and making sure I fill in all the holes necessary so that the plot runs as smoothly as possible. The first major one I’ve come across is the question of time. My first chapter was based in July but then my third chapter jumped to October. I’m not having that! So it’s changed to July. What was I thinking of?

Last but not least, thank you to all who replied to my question has anyone editing whilst hung-over? Which I posted in the League of Super Writer’s Facebook group.  The answer was…No. Makes sense.

BYE BYE!

Movie Review: Dorian Gray (2009) 2 out of 5.

Hello

Now, I’d like to start by saying this is just a movie review I think I must write given that I’ve recently read the book and I wanted to make even a small amount people aware of how poor a film version this is. So…

dorian gray 2009

Good points:

Ben Barnes (Dorian Gray), Colin Firth (Lord Henry Wotton), Ben Chaplin (Basil Hallward) and Rebecca Fox (Emily Wotton) are all on fine form. Especially Colin Firth and Ben Chaplin, who inhabit their parts very well. The style, costumes, and settings are all very good as well. Having read the book it was what I expected and it started well, handling the Dorian Gray/ Sibyl Vain (Rachel Hurd-Wood) romance and tragedy soundly and how the Dorian gets cursed. But then…

Bad points:

Too many changes. There are a lot of homosexual undertones which you have to think about whilst reading the book. Particularly between Dorian and Basil, the artist who paints the to be cursed picture. The film has them getting off with each other at one point and for me I thought Basil was obsessed with Dorian from a purely artistic point of view. Basil wants to paint the ‘perfect’ Dorian and have him as his muse. I didn’t think this was needed. I also didn’t understand why Henry Wotton was married and had a child. The book has him disliking marriage and viewing it as a waste of time. Again, no need. Once these things had been introduced I stopped caring and was more concerned with my phone and looking out of the window.

In conclusion…

If you haven’t read the book, 4 out of 5. If you have, 2 out of 5.

That is all..BYE!

The Edit 2 – Bank holiday Drinking/Hangover’s and Exercise 4.

Hello again,

 

The Edit has continued but not at the pace I thought it would. You see, as I always do in these situations, I forget to factor in the other things I like to do in my spare time. For instance, I decided to go for a run last Thursday that left me pretty tired. I was glad to burn 700 calories but as it was my first run in a couple of weeks, my knees didn’t thank me for it. I didn’t feel that editing whilst knackered would be a good idea so I didn’t do any. I’ve tried it before and it just ends up being worthless as I would only edit a small amount and would end up deleting it.

Anyway, last Friday rolled around and I managed to edit another page of my manuscript. The first chapter of my demon hunting tale, The Searcher’s Want, has already been edited before so I only concerned myself with making sure the story made sense and overall it sounded good. It did except for one part of it. The end part of the page. It came to me, whilst drinking for my friends leaving BBQ and then later in FAB café in Manchester, that I needed to change it. I had explained briefly and in a forced way a small piece of back story for my lead character. I copied the offending paragraph and replaced it with something that worked better for the chapter as a whole. It was slap bang in the middle of a chase scene and it didn’t make sense for it to be there. I’ll paste it in somewhere else when it actually makes sense. This bout of editing took up the two sessions, Friday and Sunday, but it ultimately gave me the chance to write a chase and fight scene to make the chapter work which I enjoy writing the most. These two sessions could’ve been four if not for…

Hangovers. As good as they are bad, hangovers.

Now, I think hangovers are bad because I get nothing done. I think they’re good because, for me anyway, at the end of a hangover day I’ve usually had a takeaway or something equally as greasy (a takeaway pizza on Saturday and a double cheese burger on Yesterday to be exact) and I usually end up having a great night’s sleep. Probably because I got in at 3.30-4am after each drinking session and only slept a few hours with the hangover actually keeping me awake. I did think about editing whilst hung over but it has never worked before so I didn’t break the habit. I’m not drinking now for two weeks so I’ll get a load of editing done. Promise.

OK then, I’ll get back to it. I hope you all have a good week.

Bye

And the Edit has begun…may god have mercy on us all.

Hello

 

And so it has come to this. After all the talking, moaning, wondering, asking, preying and then…Monday came along. No hiding from it with short stories or competition entries. Then was the time.

And so on. To be fair I have been slightly scared of the edit due to the size of it. 81,860 words to be exact. I am looking to edit one page a day for the next….however many days. I could work it out but you can if you like. It doesn’t make a difference. It’ll get done. I’ve edited two pages so far. Just focusing on the story and the words and sentences and the like. So far, I’ve changed the first paragraph completely and almost changed how the love interest to my lead character looks. Well, I have changed how she looks a little. Initially, I didn’t make her sound to appealing and sound good enough for my lead to take an interest when she flirts with him. Now she sounds better and I’m happy. For now. All I have to do is remember the change whenever she is mentioned again. It was only small so I think I’ll be fine.

It’s interesting how I’ve changed my first paragraph almost completely. Well to me anyway. I submitted the first chapter to www.critiquecircle.co.uk in April and received some glowing feedback about the whole thing and some less so but both were constructive. And now I’ve changed the whole first paragraph? How many more changes will I make? #screamofannoyance

But this is all part of the fun. I am enjoying it like I thought I would. I prefer the new first paragraph and I might give www.critiquecircle.co.uk another visit and find out what A.N Other thinks of it. I might message the same people who fedback to me before…

I also, en route to starting the edit, fixed my printer and watched an appalling film version of Dorian Grey. The printer only required a new cartridge but, having used it a month ago with no problems and then finding it didn’t work over the past week, I feared the worst. I.e. buying a new printer. But it’s sorted now. As for that film version, more on that later.

And I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who helped me from the League of Super Writers, a seminal writing group on Facebook that supplied me with some valuable hints and tips and a possible book to buy for help that will all help me on my editing journey. Wonderfully, there are too many helpful league members to mention so I say to you all, thank you very much.

Right, back to the edit.

Good Pie!

 

 

The edit is close and the entry is sent.

Hello

 

So, I went over my competition entry one more time and, after having to email it somewhere else due to printer problems, I printed it off at that somewhere else and sent it off! I’m feeling confident, like I always do, but even if I don’t get anything back it’s a step in right direction. It’s the first time I’ve edited one of mine or anyone else’s stories in different sections. Usually I would just make sure the story sounded good from a grammar and punctuation stand point but this time I went at it from the story, description, dialogue, location and character angles along with grammar and punctuation. I found this extremely useful as when I had edited the story previously I had assumed, for example, that the dialogue was fine. But when I only focused on that I realised it didn’t make sense where it needed to. I sorted that out and it was ready. I’m now primed to edit my NaNoWriMo 2012 entry, The Searcher’s Want. But not before I finish my final short story to prepare for the sequel to another story of mine, The Town of the Mountain.

Now, this last short story concerns the people that have shaped the world in which The Town of the Mountain and its sequel are living in. You see, the hunters from the Town have always been trained up by one person. A man who posed as the Master Craftsman that owned and made all of the wooden sculptures that he sold in his craft shop. To everyone else he is just a hunched over Craftsman but the hunters know better and each hunter is sworn to keep this secret upon penalty of death. But the Master Craftsman is so much more than just a trainer of monster hunters. He is a member of a secret guild that helps to protect the country and with the ever increasing monster threat to said country, the guild needs to take drastic measures in order to protect it.

Get in! Sorry, but I have, since creating the Master Craftsman character, wanted to write a solid back story and have him slap bang in the middle of the sequel. Thankfully, as I’ve been writing his short story, it has all come together. I should finish the story by the end of the week and then begin planning how I’m going to start editing a story with over 81,000 words to it as opposed to under 1000. That should be fun. Well, of course it will be but it will take time and I think I’ll have to fix my printer, after trying to ignore it for weeks, so I can do that effectively. I don’t think I can keep sending stuff ‘somewhere else’ and have them not get wind of me using their facilities for things there’re not meant to be used for. Anyway…

I’m off now. Thanks for reading and have a good week.

BYE

The entry is ready and a sequel is taking shape.

Hello

 

Since the last time I posted I’ve finished my entry for the 1000 word, any genre, competition! Well, I could probably go over it even more but I’ve read and read and read the thing and I’m happy. More than happy, I’m WELL happy. It may not go anywhere but it’s all good practice for keeping to a word count and it will help me to prepare for my biggest ever editing challenge, editing the Town of the Mountain. I’m looking forward to that even more because…

I’ve started to write a short story for the love interest of Markus, our hero, from that very story. She was a saloon dancer and a very popular one at that but how will take to a City when all she’s ever been used to is a Town? I wasn’t sure before I started writing it but I now, after just writing whatever came to my head, have a clear understanding as to how she will cope and what her story will be with Markus and throughout the sequel. It could change but, that’s the same with everything really isn’t it? It does mean that my sequel is now taking a more solid shape and when I come to write it, whenever that will be, I’ll be able to just charge right into it with all the resource material I’ll ever need. Hopefully.

With all this going on, I almost missed that I’m close to finishing Kidnapped by Robert Louis Stevenson. I have to say I’m going to miss it. It’s a great story and considering how old it is, 1886 to be precise, it has travelled immensely well. If I haven’t already said it, I’ll say it again. Read it. It’s well good. Get it read.

Ok. I’ve got nothing more for now. Have a good week.

Good Pie!